I may have mentioned in my last post that we are running out of money. At least that's what our SEC posting proclaimed.
It's no problem though, we just won't pay our vendors. Remember the nice new building that we moved into? We never paid the construction company that renovated the building for us. They sent the used car salesman a nasty letter wanting payment. His response was something like this:
We are currently broke, but we are trying to raise more money. We can't pay you until we do. Don't worry though, this happens a couple of times each year and we always manage to find more suckers.
The construction company sent a very nice response. In summary:
Not our problem. You signed a contract. Pay up. By the way, we are putting a lien on your assets. Have a nice day.
This is very much like the old days with the petty thief CFO. We still haven't recovered from the damage he did to our reputation.
But alas... I got paid yesterday, so they have earned my attendance for another half month.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
What a stupid place to put an iceberg
So... remember the lifeboat drill? Turns out that it may be more than a drill.
When Swiper was talking about the "reorganization" of the company, he said that he hoped we would raise more funds by the end of the month so that we could move on without distractions.
So... it turns out that there is another reason for getting the fund raising finished by the end of the month - The Mecca is out of dough.
The Sarcastic Brit sent me a link to an article in one of the online biotech trade rags. It turns out that they look at the SEC filings. It also turns out that the SEC filings say that the Mecca will be out of money next month.
I'm not surprised. I am, however a little bit embarrassed because
a) I found from an article a trade rag
b) My wife had already figured it out and wasn't at all shocked or surprised.
The question is - what to do now? Maybe they will raise more money. Then again, when the music stops next time, I could find that the person without the chair is me.
It would seem that once again, the Mecca has applied their most tried and true method of managing the budget: Keep buying stuff but ignore the avalanche of invoices. Unfortunately, people start to get wise to this behavior after a few years. Some people are even quicker, and stop sending you stuff after you screw them only once or twice. Of course, it's really hard to convince the investors that you can sell machines when your vendors won't ship the parts to you because you are a bunch of dishonest weasels who don't pay the bills, but that's just my humble opinion.
Strangely enough, I got a call from a head hunter today. Apparently, there is a company down the road from the Mecca that is in need of the better part of an engineering team. Apparently, they need a VP of engineering, as well as three or four engineers. Strange, but it sounds like MNB's old company. Maybe I should apply.
For now, things continue full steam ahead at the Mecca. Do not board the lifeboats. She's unsinkable. Besides, icebergs and water are really the same stuff... right?
When Swiper was talking about the "reorganization" of the company, he said that he hoped we would raise more funds by the end of the month so that we could move on without distractions.
So... it turns out that there is another reason for getting the fund raising finished by the end of the month - The Mecca is out of dough.
The Sarcastic Brit sent me a link to an article in one of the online biotech trade rags. It turns out that they look at the SEC filings. It also turns out that the SEC filings say that the Mecca will be out of money next month.
I'm not surprised. I am, however a little bit embarrassed because
a) I found from an article a trade rag
b) My wife had already figured it out and wasn't at all shocked or surprised.
The question is - what to do now? Maybe they will raise more money. Then again, when the music stops next time, I could find that the person without the chair is me.
It would seem that once again, the Mecca has applied their most tried and true method of managing the budget: Keep buying stuff but ignore the avalanche of invoices. Unfortunately, people start to get wise to this behavior after a few years. Some people are even quicker, and stop sending you stuff after you screw them only once or twice. Of course, it's really hard to convince the investors that you can sell machines when your vendors won't ship the parts to you because you are a bunch of dishonest weasels who don't pay the bills, but that's just my humble opinion.
Strangely enough, I got a call from a head hunter today. Apparently, there is a company down the road from the Mecca that is in need of the better part of an engineering team. Apparently, they need a VP of engineering, as well as three or four engineers. Strange, but it sounds like MNB's old company. Maybe I should apply.
For now, things continue full steam ahead at the Mecca. Do not board the lifeboats. She's unsinkable. Besides, icebergs and water are really the same stuff... right?
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Lifeboat Drill
A couple of weeks ago, the Sarcastic Brit was talking to MNB, who asked him if he knew what a "lifeboat drill" was.
The Sarcastic Brit replied "I assume it's where you decide who gets to live and who drowns".
It was a strange conversation, but it made a bit more sense today.
The Mecca has this product - StupidProduct, where they sell the instrument for modest profit, and then sell consumables for $50. Unfortunately, the consumables cost $150 to make. No worries... we'll make it up on volume.
Anyway, the management at the Mecca have been trying to find a sucker... I mean buyer for this product line. Needless to say, they couldn't find somebody with a sufficient lack of common sense. So, we just kept making more of them.
Today, they announced that we would be focusing on our core product line. I have heard that announcement several times over the last year. This time however, they also announced that they were going to lay people off. Strangely enough, the only layoffs were in Engineering. It seems that MNB took the opportunity to rid himself of two engineers. Apparently, MNB really was deciding who to throw overboard. Oddly enough, I believe that with the exception of the CEO, these two engineers were the longest standing employees of the company.
I will admit that the first candidate for the sharks is a guy best known as The Sleeper. He used to sleep in his cubicle, which would be fine, except that his snoring was very disruptive. The Sarcastic Brit used to call him in order to wake him up. He was glacial at getting things done. He used to take a chair outside for his smoke breaks. He was known for never finishing ANYTHING, let alone being on time. I only worked with him on one project. I was the project manager and he was the design engineer. We got the project done on schedule. I think that it was the first project completed successfully and on schedule at the Mecca. My secret: I treated him like a human being. Apparently, that actually works. I'd better not tell MNB though, as he will likely fire me for heresy.
The other guy was what the Mad Man from Down South called "the old practical guy" (OPG). Turns out that OPG is actually a pretty decent electrical engineer, and the only guy at the Mecca who was proficient at designing circuit boards. He was actually the only practicing electrical engineer. (The Sarcastic Brit has a degree in electrical engineering but won't own up to it, as it's much more fun to change hats each week... mechanical engineer... biochemist... industrial designer...) I'm not totally sure why OPG was sacked, but I suspect that it was because MNB has somebody with the same skill set that he wants to bring in from his former company. Of course, I get the joyous task of cleaning out OPG's cubicle. Pallbearer duty... Lovely. Bring out your dead!
At the meeting, somebody made the mistake of asking how the fund raising was going. Swiper replied that we were able to raise money last year when there was none to be had, so of course we would have no problem raising more capital this year. Apparently, there are lots of interested investors. (But have any of them actually committed money?) All we have to do is stick to the company's deliverables and meet them.
At this point the foolish employee (who happens to be the reagent manufacturing lead) replied that she has seen no such list of goals and would very much love to see them. Wow... she's new at the Mecca, and it shows. I don't know where she worked before, but it sounds like a real company. Can we all go and work for them instead?
What does all of this mean? Here is my best guess:
1) The ship is sinking.
2) Throwing people overboard will lighten the ship and slow its decent into the abyss. The fact that those people would probably be more useful helping to plug the hole is irrelevant.
3) The ship will keep sinking. More bodies will be needed to go over the edge.
The only think I haven't figured out yet is whether it is going to be me or the Sarcastic Brit who goes next. Of course, the Sarcastic Brit has been there longer than me. Maybe it's first in, first out. We shall see.
In the meantime, I think that it's time to start looking a bit harder for that life jacket.
The Sarcastic Brit replied "I assume it's where you decide who gets to live and who drowns".
It was a strange conversation, but it made a bit more sense today.
The Mecca has this product - StupidProduct, where they sell the instrument for modest profit, and then sell consumables for $50. Unfortunately, the consumables cost $150 to make. No worries... we'll make it up on volume.
Anyway, the management at the Mecca have been trying to find a sucker... I mean buyer for this product line. Needless to say, they couldn't find somebody with a sufficient lack of common sense. So, we just kept making more of them.
Today, they announced that we would be focusing on our core product line. I have heard that announcement several times over the last year. This time however, they also announced that they were going to lay people off. Strangely enough, the only layoffs were in Engineering. It seems that MNB took the opportunity to rid himself of two engineers. Apparently, MNB really was deciding who to throw overboard. Oddly enough, I believe that with the exception of the CEO, these two engineers were the longest standing employees of the company.
I will admit that the first candidate for the sharks is a guy best known as The Sleeper. He used to sleep in his cubicle, which would be fine, except that his snoring was very disruptive. The Sarcastic Brit used to call him in order to wake him up. He was glacial at getting things done. He used to take a chair outside for his smoke breaks. He was known for never finishing ANYTHING, let alone being on time. I only worked with him on one project. I was the project manager and he was the design engineer. We got the project done on schedule. I think that it was the first project completed successfully and on schedule at the Mecca. My secret: I treated him like a human being. Apparently, that actually works. I'd better not tell MNB though, as he will likely fire me for heresy.
The other guy was what the Mad Man from Down South called "the old practical guy" (OPG). Turns out that OPG is actually a pretty decent electrical engineer, and the only guy at the Mecca who was proficient at designing circuit boards. He was actually the only practicing electrical engineer. (The Sarcastic Brit has a degree in electrical engineering but won't own up to it, as it's much more fun to change hats each week... mechanical engineer... biochemist... industrial designer...) I'm not totally sure why OPG was sacked, but I suspect that it was because MNB has somebody with the same skill set that he wants to bring in from his former company. Of course, I get the joyous task of cleaning out OPG's cubicle. Pallbearer duty... Lovely. Bring out your dead!
At the meeting, somebody made the mistake of asking how the fund raising was going. Swiper replied that we were able to raise money last year when there was none to be had, so of course we would have no problem raising more capital this year. Apparently, there are lots of interested investors. (But have any of them actually committed money?) All we have to do is stick to the company's deliverables and meet them.
At this point the foolish employee (who happens to be the reagent manufacturing lead) replied that she has seen no such list of goals and would very much love to see them. Wow... she's new at the Mecca, and it shows. I don't know where she worked before, but it sounds like a real company. Can we all go and work for them instead?
What does all of this mean? Here is my best guess:
1) The ship is sinking.
2) Throwing people overboard will lighten the ship and slow its decent into the abyss. The fact that those people would probably be more useful helping to plug the hole is irrelevant.
3) The ship will keep sinking. More bodies will be needed to go over the edge.
The only think I haven't figured out yet is whether it is going to be me or the Sarcastic Brit who goes next. Of course, the Sarcastic Brit has been there longer than me. Maybe it's first in, first out. We shall see.
In the meantime, I think that it's time to start looking a bit harder for that life jacket.
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